i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
