Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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