and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Randomize
