I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
