what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize