Where are you?
In a non slutty way
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Randomize
