just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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