I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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