i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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