The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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