this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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