sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
