dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I need water and some morals
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
