where does the pee come out of this thing
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
