But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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