I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm always down for nudity.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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