And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
