May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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