ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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