hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
It's not a walk of shame if you run
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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