spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Randomize
