Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
