i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
