Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
