apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Randomize
