Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
