problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Randomize
