It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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