When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
