Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
