i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
