We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
soo... how was my night?
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