I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
