Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
