I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize