is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
