sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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