she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Umm I'm too high to move.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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