I bet he comes in French.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize