i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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