Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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