you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize