He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
