Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
