there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
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