I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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