You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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