I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I will be naked everywhere
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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