Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
