we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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